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Simple Tips to Help You Create an Alter ego and Overcome Social Anxiety
Creating an alter ego is one way to break free from the box that you’ve found yourself in with respect to social anxiety or just life in general.
In essence, it’s a way to bridge the gap betweenwhere you are now and where you want to be in life.
Why Try Creating an Alter Ego?
Our minds are funny things—they can’t distinguish between what we tell them is real and what’s actually real.
This means that whatever situation you are in, what you tell yourself about it is probably more important than what’s actually going on.
In turn, this affects how we act and react, because we act and feel in accordance with how we imagine ourselves to be.
Once you realize this, you should also realize that your imagination is the most powerful tool you have.
If thoughts create your reality, and your mind can’t discern between reality and what you tell yourself about a situation, then you have the power to change. In fact, you always had the power, all along.
An alter ego allows you to focus on a positive future, challenge assumptions about yourself and your life, and avoid falling into predictable patterns.
It can also help you to lighten up and have some funwhen you set yourself free from the limits that you and other people have placed on you with their expectations.
It’s time to live out a better version of yourself.
To step out of your comfort zone.
And to make life more fun.
Are you ready?
Dealing With the Critics
Most people with social anxiety fear taking risks because they might “look stupid,” or people might laugh.
“Who do you think you are?”
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“You can’t do that”
“What will people think?”
“What if I fail?”
This is where your alter ego can step in. Because your alter ego doesn’t care, isn’t afraid, and thinks challenges are exciting, not scary.
“Let them think what they want.”
“At least I tried.”
Calling on your alter ego lets you silence the critics. And don’t kid yourself, the biggest critic is actually you—not anyone around you.
(Interested to learn more about creating an alter ego? Watch the video below with Todd Herman, high-performance coach and author of the book The Alter Ego Effect)
Making the Most of it When Creating an Alter Ego
Whatever is lacking or missing in your life, your alter ego has in theirs. You’ll see this when you work on the journaling prompts I’ve listed below.
She dreams big and lives the life you’ve always imagined. It’s a life beyond your wildest dreams. Your alter ego helps you to push past fear. Whatever situation you are in, imagine what this higher version of yourself would do.
Figuring Out What You Want in Life
Focusing on your present circumstances only creates more of the same. To move beyond that, you need to imagine something really fantastic, in detail.
You need to be able to imagine and believe in a future that is different than the one you are currently in.
In a way, your alter ego is a role model for the life you want to live. Except, unlike any role model in the real world, you can create the alter ego to have your perfect life.
Remember to aim for the stars.
1. Imagine your ideal physical health, mental health, relationship status, economic status, living situation, etc.Write down details of this new life, both macro and micro level. Spend five minutes a day brainstorming what you want in life. You’ll know you’ve found it when you feel inspired and invigorated by what you’ve written down.
2. Figure out where you are now, in relation to this life.
Creating an Alter Ego
Time to get out your journal and a pen!
1. What is your alter ego’s name?
2. What does she do for a living?
3. Who are her friends?
4. What is her personality?
5. What are her political views?
6. How does she dress?
7. How does she walk?
8. Does she have any mannerisms?
9. What does her voice sound like?
10. What is her hairstyle?
These are just a list of suggestions. Feel free to continue adding more details as they come to you.
1. Sometimes you will need to call upon your alter ego. To help you with this, find a way to invoke your alter ego with a cue, mantra, or call-to-action. For example, wear a pendant necklace and hold it in your hand while saying a phrase such as “Calling on Wonder Woman” (or whatever name you’ve given yourself).
2. Once you’ve called upon your alter ego, act according to how you would expect her to handle the situation you are in.
3. Create a list of goals for yourself, by calling upon your alter ego and considering what she would aim to achieve.
Putting Your Alter Ego Into Practice
Taking on your alter ego means not feeling constrained by who you’ve been in the past, who others think you are, or who you think you’re meant to be. Dream your wildest dreams today and step into the role of your alter ego.
Creating an alter ego and stepping into that person’s shoes stretches who you can become. Maybe your alter ego doesn’t have the fears you have. Maybe your alter ego thinks it’s fun to talk to strangers or loves the challenge of giving a speech.
Here are some things you can do to draw out your alter ego:
- Wear an item that reminds you of your alter ego. For example, a t-shirt. Every time you notice the item, it should remind you that you’re acting as if you are your alter ego today.
- Imagine what your alter ego would do in terms of health today and then do it. That might mean tackling a challenging workout or eating only the healthiest foods today.
- Behave in social interactions how you imagine your alter ego would behave.
- Make decisions throughout the day by consulting what your alter ego would do.
- Wear clothes that your alter ego would wear.
- Speak the way you think your alter ego would speak.
- Style your hair the way your alter ego would.
- Walk the way your alter ego would walk.
- Anything else you can think of that would be acting like your alter ego!
One last thing. Today, I want you to do do something fun that your normal self would never do, but your alter ego wouldn’t think twice about.
Get as silly as you want about this, it’s meant to not be taken seriously.
What is the one thing you think you can’t do, for whatever reason? If you find yourself at some point telling yourself “I can’t do that,” you’ve found what it is. Go do it today.
Related Posts about Mindset and Social Anxiety
- The Best Mindset Transformation Coaching Program
- Why Your Positive Affirmations Aren’t Working
- 30 Positive Affirmations for Social Anxiety
Creating an Alter Ego
Here are some of my favorite social anxiety tools
Thanks for reading! I hope you found some helpful tips. Since this site is about social anxiety, I wanted to also share some tools I use that I hope you’ll find helpful. Some of these are affiliate links, so if you decide to try them, I’ll earn a commission. However, I only recommend things I have used myself and would recommend to a friend or family member.
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Adopting an alter ego like Sasha Fierce, or simply thinking of yourself in the third person can help you stick to your goals — whether it be a new exercise routine, carrying out a business plan, or staying clean.What is the root cause of social anxiety? ›
Some of the most common causes of social anxiety include: Poor self-esteem or lack of confidence. Negative core beliefs about oneself. Inefficient coping skills.What is Beyonce's alter ego? ›
But Beyoncé isn't the only name she's known by; in the early days of her solo career the singer created a new alternative identity for herself — Sasha Fierce.What is an alter ego example? ›
Alter ego can also refer to the second, hidden side of one's own self. In Robert Louis Stevenson's classic The Strange Case of Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Dr. Jekyll is a good-hearted, honorable man; but after taking a potion, his alter ego, the loathsome and diabolical Mr.What triggers alter ego? ›
There are a variety of triggers that can cause switching between alters, or identities, in people with dissociative identity disorder. These can include stress, memories, strong emotions, senses, alcohol and substance use, special events, or specific situations. In some cases, the triggers are not known.How do you bring out alters? ›
A positive trigger is something non-trauma related and is pleasant enough to cause an alter to come forward and experience happy emotions, such as a special toy, cute puppies, or a favorite ice cream flavor. A positive trigger, in some instances, can be used to bring forth an alter.How long does it take to beat alter ego? ›
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A dormant Anhata Chakra causes social anxiety, hostility, or distrust towards our loved ones. It is located in the throat, the anatomical equivalent of this is the pharyngeal plexus. It represents communication and self-expression.Are you born with social anxiety or is it developed? ›
Though social anxiety disorder typically starts in childhood or adolescence, people can also develop it later in life. The causes of social anxiety are biopsychosocial, which means it can be a result of a combination of a person's biology, psychology and social environment, says Neal-Barnett.Who is most affected by social anxiety disorder? ›
In general, females tend to be more affected by social anxiety than males, and this gender difference is usually more pronounced in adolescents and young adults. Although the majority of social anxiety disorders cases start in adolescence, these difficulties can start as early as preschool.
- Measure what's inside and outside your comfort zone. ...
- Set personal goals. ...
- Take action — one step at a time. ...
- Find your sweet spot. ...
- Cultivate a positive mental attitude. ...
- Hang out with like-minded people.
- Be Aware of Your Body Language. Nonverbal communication, such as posture and facial expressions, is as important as your words. ...
- Be mindful of your tone of voice. ...
- Become a better listener. ...
- Check the facts. ...
Social Anxiety can be considered a disability by the Social Security Administration (SSA). Thus, you could be able to receive Social Security disability benefits with social anxiety disorder.Who is Lady Gaga alter ego? ›
Jo Calderone is a fictional male alter-ego to Lady Gaga created in 2010.Does Adele have an alter ego? ›
In a 2011 Rolling Stone cover story, Adele said she dealt with onstage anxiety by creating the alter ego "Sasha Carter", derived from Beyoncé's "Sasha Fierce" and June Carter. During one episode after she met Beyoncé, Adele said, she asked "What would Sasha Fierce do?" and that helped.Does Justin Bieber have an alter ego? ›
Justin Bieber / Shawty Mane - Teen pop star Justin Bieber gave himself a rap alter ego, Shawty Mane, after freestyling over Vado's "Speaking in Tongues.” Shawty wasn't bad and also showed his spit game when he rhymed on Chris Brown's "Ladies Love Me" in 2011. (Photo: Vittorio Zunino Celotto/Getty Images)What is alter ego type personality? ›
An alter ego (Latin for "other I", "doppelgänger") means an alternate self, which is believed to be distinct from a person's normal or true original personality. Finding one's alter ego will require finding one's other self, one with a different personality.Is alter ego split personality? ›
Dissociative identity disorder was previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), sometimes incorrectly called "split personality", it is characterized by the presence of more than one sense of identity within a single human body. These alternate identities are commonly known as alters or dissociated parts.Is alter ego a mental disorder? ›
Dissociative identity disorder.
Formerly known as multiple personality disorder, this disorder is characterized by "switching" to alternate identities.
Ego states develop as a way to cope with severe traumatic events in childhood. When a child is in distress, repeatedly, the child does not develop a healthy sense of self or ego. Instead, the ego splits off into different states that are connected to the 'fight-flight-freeze' response.
In fiction, a character's alter ego can take several forms—a hidden identity, a secondary personality, or a secret life being led in addition to a normal life.What is the alter ego coping mechanism? ›
Adopting an alter ego is an extreme form of 'self-distancing', which involves taking a step back from our immediate feelings to allow us to view a situation more dispassionately.Can you talk to alters in your head? ›
For those with co-conscious alters, communication is similar to talking with any other person, just without the presence of a separate physical body. It may be difficult, however, when you have alters or parts of you that you are not conscious of.Can you make yourself have alters? ›
For those that developed dissociative identity disorder as children in response to trauma, then yes, it is possible to continue to create alters and parts later on in life if the circumstances and the DID system necessitate it.How do you know if an alter is fronting? ›
While every alter is going to experience a range of emotions, many of us have a relatively consistent emotional baseline that we return to when our emotional state is fairly neutral. If this baseline is particularly distinctive, this is usually the easiest clue about who is fronting.How many alter egos does a person have? ›
The average number is about 10. Often alters are stable over time, continuing to play specific roles in the person's life for years.What is a super alter ego? ›
The concept of the superhero alter-ego is one that has sparked debates for the ages. The idea that these super-characters use other identities to keep their heroic exploits under wraps adds layer upon layer to the psychology of the superhero, as well as giving rise to drama, comedy and, above all, plot twists.What is alter ego strong against? ›
Alter Egos are strong against Foreigners, deal more damage to the four Cavalry Classes (Rider, Caster, Assassin, Berserker), and deal less damage to the three Knight Classes (Saber, Archer and Lancer) as well as Pretenders.Can you create an alternate personality? ›
No, you cannot give yourself DID.Can alters be created? ›
According to this theory, alters are created when no existing parts can integrate new materials (e.g., memories, strong emotions, perceptions, attachment styles) because these materials are too threatening or are perceived as conflicting too strongly with what is already held.
An alter ego (Latin for "other I", "doppelgänger") means an alternate self, which is believed to be distinct from a person's normal or true original personality. Finding one's alter ego will require finding one's other self, one with a different personality.Can two people switch personalities? ›
Dissociative Identity Disorder (Multiple Personality Disorder) A mental health condition, people with dissociative identity disorder (DID) have two or more separate personalities. These identities control a person's behavior at different times.What is it called when you create another personality? ›
Dissociative identity disorder (DID) If you have dissociative identity disorder you will experience intense changes in your identity. You may feel like different aspects (states) of your identity are in control of your behaviour and thoughts at different times.Can you develop DID without trauma? ›
It doesn't have to have been caused by a traumatic or stressful event. Many people think that this disorder might be more common than previously thought.What is a fragmented alter? ›
Fragment. Some alters are very limited in their role, for example they may only have a small number of emotions, hold particular isolated memories or have a very limited job. These 'partial' alters are sometimes known as fragments. [How long does it take alters to form? ›
In time, such a child may begin to emotionally and cognitively split into alternate identities. Research has shown that the average age for the initial development of alters is 5.9 years old.What does DID splitting feel like? ›
Sudden mood swings: When someone is in a splitting episode, it can cause rapid and dramatic changes in mood, unstable emotions, and impulsive behavior. They might instantly become furious or thrilled, even if they felt the opposite way before.What mental illness has an alter ego? ›
Dissociative identity disorder.
Formerly known as multiple personality disorder, this disorder is characterized by "switching" to alternate identities. You may feel the presence of two or more people talking or living inside your head, and you may feel as though you're possessed by other identities.