Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you were seduced? Does the word “seduced” have a positive or negative connotation for you?
Seduction is actually a powerful tool when used the right way—it’s the art of getting what you want from someone without asking, and it can be used to get anything in life including love, sex, money, or even something simple like an ice cream cone! But too often people use seduction for the wrong reasons and end up hurting others instead of helping them.
Friends, today’s guest is the incredible Robert Green. He is a New York Times bestselling author of the book, The Art of Seduction. Robert is one of my favorite guests to have on. He was actually the very first guest on the School of Greatness podcast, and he’s visited a few times since then. We’ll link all the previous interviews with him if you want to check them out.
In this episode, we discuss the biggest mistakes people make when trying to find love. We dive into how to maintain a thriving long-term relationship, how to master the art of seduction, whether you’re single or in a committed relationship, the three things to focus on after you go through a breakup, and so much more. I don’t think I’ve ever heard Robert talk about these subjects with so much depth, so you’re in for a treat.
Who is Robert Greene?
Robert Greene is a world-famous American author known for his books on seduction, strategy, and power. He has six international bestselling books to his name including the New York Times bestsellers, The 48 Laws of Power, The 33 Strategies of War, Mastery, The 50th Law, and The Laws of Human Nature. His new book, The Daily Laws: 366 Meditations on Power, Seduction, Mastery, Strategy, and Human Nature, offers a daily dose of concise and refined wisdom through easy-to-digest lessons readers can learn each day.
Growing up in Los Angeles, Robert attended the University of California, Berkeley before finishing a degree in classical studies at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. After finishing college, Robert worked many jobs, from a construction worker to a magazine editor, translator, and Hollywood movie writer, before eventually becoming a bestselling author.
Through his written works, Robert Greene teaches readers how to detach themselves from their own emotions and master self-control. He also shows them how to look behind people’s masks, how to develop the empathy that leads to insight, how to resist conformity to develop their own sense of purpose, and how to master the art of seduction.
How to Master the Art of Seduction
Seduction is not a word that should be taken lightly. It’s an art form, and it takes time to master. You can’t just show up at someone’s door and expect them to fall in love with you, even if you’re the best-looking person on the planet. There are many factors that go into seducing someone: your looks, what you say, when you say it, how often you contact them without seeming too needy or desperate…the list goes on and on! If there’s one thing to know about seductive techniques though, it’s this — they work. Seduction can make people feel special and unique, so whether you are trying to get a date, close a business deal, or just meet new people, having the ability to charm and captivate someone can make all the difference.
“Even in love at first sight, … you still have to go through a process where the other person’s character that you start idealizing and romanticizing and thinking about them, … [there’s] that immediate attraction, there is still the seduction process that has to go on. So in the art of seduction, I make the point that political seduction, marketing seduction, social seduction is the same process. [Seduction] is getting the other person to think about you and getting them to fall in love with your product, with your idea, with your political platform, or whatever it is.” – Robert Greene
Seduction isn’t just about sex and relationships but it also applies to many aspects of life, including our careers, hobbies, interests, and even how we carry ourselves. There is social seduction, political seduction, marketing seduction, and so much more. But regardless of the type, they all go through the same process of getting people to get closer to you, or communicate more deeply with you. But you have to do it naturally, without causing the other party to sense that you’re manipulating them.
“If people sense that you’re trying to manipulate them, they will close off, and that’s why in advertising and marketing, they know that they have to make it seem like they’re not advertising — that is just kind of word of mouth, [or] just the average person on the street whose shouting their products, et cetera, because if your advertising and it’s so clear how you’re manipulating, [then] it doesn’t work. So the trick in seduction is to have such a gentle touch that people don’t even understand what’s going on; that’s what a master seducer can do.” – Robert Greene
How often do you find yourself in a situation where you want to ask someone out on a date, but are not sure how? Whether it is because of shyness or insecurity, there are many challenges that can come with the act of asking someone out. But it should first start from having self-confidence and projecting a degree of calmness while acting naturally with a gentle touch.
“So probably the most important lesson I tell people in the realm of seduction is to be able to project a degree of confidence and calmness and comfort with yourself. [These] are probably the most important qualities.” – Robert Greene
The first step to mastering the art of seduction is to believe in yourself. You are sexy, confident, and incredibly awesome! These feelings will radiate outwards and make you more attractive. Once you feel this way about yourself, it’s time to take action.
“Confidence is extremely important in the realm of seduction. You can almost not go wrong with it. Yes, you can border on being insane and grandiose, but the feeling of that person is comfortable and confident and has that kind of inner force or energy that’s coming up from somewhere they don’t know is very powerful and very compelling. … [On the contrary,] the lack of confidence is extremely anti-seductive.” – Robert Greene
Robert Green just shared the secret ingredient to seduction, which you can apply in many facets in life, including relationships. But some relationships come and go, even the experts in seduction are no exception. At some point in our lives, we all need to learn how to say goodbye. Whether you are single and ready for a new love or have been with the same person for years, breakups are an inevitable part of life. Coming out on top isn’t easy but it is possible, and our guest has some advice on how to move on after a breakup.
- Lure Your Target. The first seduction step, according to Greene, is to spend some time learning more about your potential target to discover what target type they most embody. ...
- Step 2: Sink Your Hook. ...
- Step 3: Reel in Your Catch. ...
- Step 4: Devour Your Prey.
- Choose the right victim. ...
- Create a false sense of security — approach indirectly. ...
- Send mixed signals. ...
- Appear to be an object of desire. ...
- Create a need — stir anxiety and discontent. ...
- Master the art of insinuation. ...
- Enter their spirit. ...
- Create temptation.
There are nine different types of seducers, according to Robert Greene in the Art of Seduction: The Siren, The Rake, The Ideal Lover, The Dandy, The Natural, The Coquette, The Charmer, The Charismatic and The Star. The author claims that everyone attracts through one of these character profiles.What does Robert Greene say about love? ›
“Love at first sight doesn't necessarily lead to something. You still need to go through the process to find out the other person's character.” @robertgreene.What are the 3 pillars of seduction? ›
- lean in.
- intimate gazing.
- hands touch face.
The Natural seducer is the one who has somehow retained the childhood traits. They have an innocent quality about them which makes them irresistible. Like a child they are impish, vulnerable and defenseless, open and spontaneous. They make their audience lower their guards because they appear so guileless and fresh.What is the 1st law of seduction? ›
The first lesson of seduction is not to be overeager. Early on, you shouldn't put your cards on the table and tell your target exactly what you want. You must be indirect and elusive. If you approach at wholehearted bound, you're going to appear desperately insecure.What are the 64 skills of seduction? ›
- Playing on musical instruments.
- Union of dancing, singing, and playing instrumental music.
- Writing and drawing.
- Arraying and adorning an idol with rice and flowers.
And nothing can be more basic than the five senses - sense of sight,sense of smell, sense of taste, sense of hearing, sense of touch. These canreally keep things sizzling hot during sex. Vatsayan would have definitelyvouched for that! We get modern day experts to share more onit...What type of seducer is the ideal lover? ›
Type 6—“The Ideal Lover”—lures in their targets by figuring out what the target longs for most in life, then modifying their own personality to fulfill that desire. For instance, if a target desires romance, this type passionately woos them—even if such behavior doesn't come naturally to them.
The Ideal Lover archetype is a master of seduction and charm, using their natural charisma and charisma to attract and win over others. They are often seen as the perfect partner, embodying all of the qualities that people look for in a romantic relationship.What is a siren in seduction? ›
The Siren archetype is used as a metaphor for a woman who uses her beauty and charm to exert control and influence over others. The archetype serves as a warning of the dangers and consequences of being seduced by someone who uses their charm for their own benefit.How do you seduce a long term relationship? ›
- Be conscious about compliments. ...
- Get dressed up for each other. ...
- Get touchy. ...
- Send racy messages. ...
- Leave each other notes. ...
- Talk about your fantasies.
- Gradually deepen intimacy.
- Use body language.
- Get out of your comfort zones together.
- Remain your own person.
- Understand their needs.
- Offer small acts of kindness.
- Be patient.
- Don't try to force it.
Every seduction has two elements that you must analyze and understand: first, yourself and what is seductive about you; and second, your target and the actions that will penetrate their defenses and create surrender.What is the 48 Laws of Power law seduce? ›
Consequently, in his controversial book, “The 48 Laws of Power,” best-selling author Robert Greene argues that if you manage to seduce, charm, and deceive your opponents, you will attain the ultimate power. Greene states that the better you become at handing power, the better friend, lover, and person you will become.